Thursday, 2 May 2013

Additional Education

From what I gather your twenties are about self discovery and finding out who you are. Well this week I had a light bulb moment. You really cannot put your happiness in other people's hands.

When I was younger, I had two life defining instances where the person I thought I was, and the life that I lived were tossed and turned completely upside down, and for want of a better word, the life as i knew it, was pulled from under me by two people that I had empowered to define who I was. This left me lost, unsure, and incredibly hurt and confused as to how I could be spat out by people that I had given all if myself to. It was part of growing up for me, and granted, I don't think I would go back and change a thing as hellish as it was at the time, I would not be what I am without having been thrown out if that friendship nest, twice, and left to pick myself up.

As a young adult (or mid range adult if I remain honest) I have become someone who now recognises the value in having certain people in my life, choosing to have them close to me, rather than by default. Along the way, I am still very much learning the need to manage my own expectations. I am still very quick to trust that people will have same values and respect as me. This trait, often still smacks me in my mid range face as I tend invest too much of my desired and sometimes expected, outcome in others.

It is not other people who can make you happy. You are the only one who can determine where your happiness comes from. Individuals can add to our happiness, and add to the experiences you have in life, but they cannot be what makes you happy.

The lesson today lovely humans (I hope!), is to live your life looking out for yourself and yourself only. Feel happy and content through your own being. Do not allow yourself to be let down by other people, or to have others prevent you from experiencing your true life. Take your relationships for face value, and protect your own happiness by doing things that make you feel light, energetic and radiant. Even if it means following your path on your own, your most valued relationships should be there to add to your experience, not be the experience.


  1. Never a truer word was said!

  2. Well said Leesh. If you have no expectations of people, then you are not disappointed. And you leave yourself open to receive nice little surprises.